everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize