I am puke
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize