You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
