oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
