If that was your dad, he is hot
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
