I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
