I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
I have aggressive nipples.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
