Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
My friends, they love my intelligence
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
