you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Randomize
