You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
