OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
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