I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
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