I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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