yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Don't EVER smell your tampon
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
