At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
