Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
