Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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