i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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