I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
