I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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