so explain again why im purple
no
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
