Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
