Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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