Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize
