We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
