Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
