new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
