Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
is it fun? or sober?
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
