dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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