found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
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