yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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