I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
