similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
When are your genitals available?
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
