I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
