Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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