found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
