i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
Randomize
