No awkward lesbian experiences without me
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Randomize
