It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
