I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
