You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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