My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
