so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm getting married
To pizza
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
