i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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