Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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