Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
