We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Randomize
