wat bout pragnant strippers??
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
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