i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize
