all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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